Just back from the Easter Vigil at Turvey Abbey, and my mind is working slowly after getting up at 3.00 a.m. for the 4.30 start. I am not a morning person! But the beauty was worth the early hour as we stood outside in darkness to light the Easter Candle from a fire kindled in the grounds, then lit our own small candles from it before moving in loose procession to the chapel as we sang:
O light so joyous, eternal splendour of the Father,
holy and blessed, Jesus Christ.
The symbolism of fire is incredibly ancient and reflects all faiths, but today its light was for Christ and his resurrection. And as our vigil continued, the earth showed us her own resurrection, as birds carolled the returning daylight.
I struggle. I really struggle to believe in the resurrection, this most central of the tenets of my faith. I want to believe, it would make life so much easier. It would be comforting. But it sometimes seems ridiculous. It seems obvious that the story could have been tacked on in the early days of the church to give its teachings authority (the “Pauline conspiracy” theory). And yet… there were moments this morning when I believed unreservedly.
But does it matter? Does the question of Christ’s resurrection mean that his life and teachings are irrelevant?
For some reason, the similar-sounding word ‘insurrection’ popped into my head today as I thought of the word resurrection.
Insurrection n.: an act or instance of rising in revolt, rebellion, or resistance against civil authority or an established government.
Whoever he was, Christ’s life was an act of rebellion. He ate with sinners, prostitutes, tax collectors; he taught that material things are unimportant; he spoke out in strange riddles against the authorities of the day; he threw out the money changers from the temple. It is from this man that Christian concepts of social justice have come.
This man laid on us the duty that to follow him, our lives must be in some way an insurrection.
And I suspect that this preoccupation with social justice is an aspect of Christianity that is easier for non-Christians to swallow. There have been, after all, many great teachers of non-violence and justice who did not claim to be – or have their followers claim them to be – the sons or daughters of God. So the Christian as reformer, as ‘do-gooder’, has a familiar place in the world.
The Christian as believer in Jesus Christ, both fully human and fully divine, who was tortured to death and then rose again in his physical body after three days? Well that Christian is clearly a bit desperate, clinging to something impossible out of fear or ignorance. Or is she?
It makes me wonder if the daily re-creation of the resurrection by the taking in of Christ to our inner selves and living inwardly and outwardly by his example, is our real work of insurrection.
(And if so, how terribly far I have to go!)
A happy and blessed Easter to you all.
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{ 12 comments… read them below or add one }
Tess
I think that the resurrection does matter, but I also think that the church gets too hung up about defending the historical dimension of it. In my view, it’s not such a big step for God (who came to earth as a human) to suspend the laws of nature at the key point in our human story.
I love your idea of insurrection – appeals to my rebellious, non-conformist mind!
This year I’ve been thinking a lot about the liberation and hope that the Resurrection brings, and the energy for re-creation that we all need for daily life following Christ.
I hope that you’ve recovered from the early start and also that you may know the peace and insurrection of Christ this Easter… and every day.
Tess, this is such a beautiful and thoughtful post full of bold words with which my heart resonates. I wrestle with the historical, literal reality of resurrection and the Jesus of boundary-breakers is the one who speaks most profoundly to me. For me, the resurrection story is one that appears in every moment, as does the suffering and death story, since the beginning of time, not just for 2000 years. I see it each day in the rise and fall of each day and the yearly movement of the seasons. Easter blessings to you friend.
Bless you, Tess, for your courage and vulnerability. You speak the doubts on many hearts, and bring us further on the journey. I think God wants us to struggle and wrestle with these things. If everything were obvious, why would it require faith?
Happy Easter to you!
A holy, peaceful and joyous Easter to you, Tess.
Who knows what happened many years ago? There is no faith without doubt. However, and it is a big however, Christ is alive and well in us and that is insurrection enough for me.
oh, tess–i join you in this holy struggle…and i, too, have those moments when i believe unreservedly even in the midst of unknowing. thank you for being so vulnerable here with us. it brings me comfort as i continue to journey with the knowing and the unknowing.
i, of course, love the idea of insurrection.
it makes my post today feel blessed and triumphant. thank you. love & hugs!!
Interestingly, the Gnostics did not, generally, believe in a physical resurrection and considered those who did to be less sophisticated or more gullible than they felt themselves to be. I believe in re-birth (how can you hear the birds sing and not believe?), but whether this is what the resurrection meant I don’t know. For sure though, insurrection rocks and long may it continue to keep those who attempt to control us through our beliefs and our fears on their toes.
@ER: yes, the words liberation and hope are key to me, as well.
@Christine: it’s an extraordinary mix of the everyday and the extraordinary.
@Pam: my understanding is that you see this idea of struggle more clearly in the Jewish faith (Jacob wrestling with the angel) – that Jews are supposed to question and wrestle with their beliefs.
@Barbara: yes, we continue holding the light.
@Lucy: my insurrectionist friend, I was so glad to read your blessed and triumphant post.
@Liz: thanks for this comment, I must read more about the Gnostics. I enjoyed our conversations about all this yesterday.
Hello Tess. I’ve been away from home & off-line for 36 hours so I’m now catching up on Easter posts. Summary response: every word resonates with me, particularly this Easter. I struggle; I have s-o-o-o far to go. Thank you for this honest, articulate, powerful post.
Elaine, thank you, I’m glad to know we’re on the same wavelength. I hope you enjoyed your break.
Tess! This post has stayed with me long.
In honesty in faith, you have not far to go!
Mystical realism!
kigen – mystical realism, I like that phrase. You may see that popping up in a post at some point…
I commend to you the writings of Wendell Berry who wrote: Practice Resurrection!
Seems to me that the greatest act of faith is asking questions.
Hugs!
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